Posts filed under ‘Celebrities’

My niece, the warrior

Working at the paper you see a lot of press releases, some about local matters but also a few about what’s happening further away from home. You get used to seeing familiar names, names you can put to faces you see in the grocery store or at work, in the local press releases but when it comes to the press releases from Jeff City or even Washington you are used to floating in a sea of names that you may have seen before but rarely the people those names are attached to. When you get a press release from out of the country and it’s not just someone you know but are related to it really jumps up and gets your attention. Let me introduce you to my niece, Leona and see what the gubmint says about her in the press release.

Sgt. Leona Bastow tests a sample of MOGAS at the Camp Bondsteel Fuel Testing Facility. Bastow is responsible for ensuring all fuel that enters Camp Bondsteel meets all U.S. Army standards before the fuel trucks are unloaded…Sgt. Ty Stafford, public affairs specailist/National Guard.

CAMP BONDSTEEL, Kosovo — Sergeant Leona Bastow, a resident of Nevada, Mo., was recently honored for her achievements in the renovation of the Camp Bondsteel Fuel Lab by the Multi-National Task Force (East) commander Brig. Gen. Larry D. Kay.

Bastow is currently on deployment with the Kansas City-based 110th Maneuver Enhancement Brigade, in support of the NATO-led peace keeping mission in Kosovo.

Bastow works as the petroleum laboratory specialist at the Fuel Lab and is responsible for grading the quality and usability of all fuel that enters the base.

After all fuel testing is complete, Bastow gives the go ahead to the Kellogg, Brown and Root workers at the fuel yard to release the trucks to begin downloading the fuel.

Normally from start to finish, Bastow says the whole testing process takes a little more than an hour to complete.

“It’s a lot of responsibility, but if we have bad fuel or fuel that doesn’t meet the minimum requirements then that directly affects the mission,” she said.

To date, she has not turned away any fuel.

Her military career spans four years. This is her first deployment.

Bastow and her husband Rodney are residents of the southern Missouri area and she is a graduate of Nevada High School.

The MNTF(E) operates under the flag of the Army National Guard’s 110th Maneuver Enhancement Brigade, the first non-divisional unit to assume the leadership role for the mission, and is part of the larger NATO-led international force known as the Kosovo Force. The KFOR is responsible for maintaining peace and security in Kosovo.

Bastow, who deployed along with over a 1,000 other Missouri National Guard Soldiers, is expected to return to the U.S. sometime in March 2009.

Kosovo Forces 10 (KFOR 10), Multi National Task Force East is the 16th rotation of United States Forces in Kosovo since 1999 — when the organization entered Kosovo under the United Nations mandate –two days after the adoption of UN Security Council Resolution 1244.

United States forces include the 110th MEB, along with National Guard and Army Reserve units (from seven states), the Air Force, the Regular Army and civilian contractors. Units from Armenia, Greece, Lithuania, Poland, Romania, and Ukraine form the international portion of the Task Force. Brig. Gen. Larry D. Kay commands MNTF (E) as the senior Army Commander in the Balkans region.

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August 27, 2008 at 2:51 pm 2 comments

Paris ad hilarious

Paris Hilton appeared in an ad, posted on FunnyorDie.com, that spoofs a recent McCain ad that I liked. If more politicians could laugh at themselves like McCain did after seeing this then I wouldn’t dread the elections as much as I do.

[Update. I can’t seem to embed the video for some reason. Heres a link.]
Starring Paris Hilton, Written by Adam McKay, Produced by Chris Henchy, Directed by Jake Szymanski.

August 9, 2008 at 3:02 pm 10 comments

Dear Abby and other fictional characters

Working at the newspaper there are some things that I can’t avoid, however much I’d like to. Dear Abby is one. As far as I’m concerned it’s just the Jerry Springer show on newsprint.

A few years ago I was proofreading a page Dear Abby was on and I couldn’t help laughing at the woman who wrote in. She said she had been married for 25 years and her husband couldn’t remember to put the toilet seat down. Abby clucked along with her and blamed the man of course. They agreed the man seemed incapable of learning anything.

I had a different take on it. She was the one who was sitting down on cold porcelain, not her husband. She is the one who had the constant reminders. Why didn’t she put the toilet seat down before sitting? As far as I could see she was the one with a learning disability.

Yesterday another in the never-ending horde of people who shouldn’t be allowed out without a keeper wrote in. He complained that people tended to stare at him and ask questions about the 20 something piercings he has. Link

“Eight of the piercings are in my face, and most of the others are in my ears. My main ear holes are stretched out to a half-inch.”

Now why would anyone look twice at someone like that? I just can’t seem to understand why.
Wonder of wonder Abby started to give an answer to Future Skin Artist that made sense, then she reverted to normal and went off the deep end of wacky.

“You have chosen to look different, so you shouldn’t be surprised at the staring and the questions. . . Perhaps in the future you should consider moving to Los Angeles. In this town everyone has seen almost everything, and people who are different are less shocking.”

Why would Abby pick Los Angeles to suggest as a location for unusual people? I feel I must go to the defense of all those other idiocracies we have in this country. Why San Francisco, just up the coast, is as fine an example of stupidity in action as can be found anywhere. California must have a good score or so of towns where Skin could find himself a slew of idiots just at dumb as he is to run around with. Vermont, Massachusetts, Rhode Island and New Hampshire to name just a few have plenty of communities where he could fit right in.

I would have answered him differently but I would have started out similarly. “You’ve decided to alter your appearance and people are going to notice. Some of them are going to be curious enough to do more than look, they will ask questions. There is nothing illegal about what you are doing and you have a perfect right to pierce your body anywhere you want to. Don’t be defensive. Answer their questions courteously and you might find that you have met a new friend. It’s your decision and you should own it, man up and walk proud. Skulk around and avoid eye contact and people will think there is something wrong with you, whether you have piercings or not.”

Then again I wouldn’t solicit letters from anyone seeking advice anyway. It is so old-fashioned and Victorian. This is the age of the Internet, surely there are better ways to find advice than writing to some busybody with nothing better to do than tell everyone around them what to do.

I guess Dear Abby performs a public service but so does the guy who unclogs the sewers. I don’t want to watch him work either.

August 9, 2008 at 2:16 am Leave a comment

McCain vs Britney, Barack and Moses

McCain released an ad featuring a video montage of images of Barack Obama slyly comparing his celebrity to Britney Spears and Paris Hilton as voices in the background shouted “Obama! Obama!” The left wingers went nuts – ok, they already qualify but they went nuttier than usual.

The ad that I like best, however is the one featuring Charlton Heston as Moses. Emperor Misha doesn’t like McCain but even he complimented his campaign for this ad. Priceless

This is where Obama is vulnerable, his inexperience, his vanity and the bloated expectations of his followers. McCain is wise to point these out to any voters still sitting on the fence.

August 4, 2008 at 4:41 am 2 comments


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